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"Where's Cambodia?" "You're in Campuchia, you stupid men!" - Fate Fairies - book version
This entry was posted on 1/23/2012 2:00 AM and is filed under Fate Fairies:Fate Fairies - book version.
By 2004, I had done enough research on the countries of our old Vietnam War era, I knew I could get from Vietnam to Cambodia and or Laos with minimal effort in regards to securing Visas. I had sent the necessary paper work to the Vietnamese Embassy in Washington to get a multiple-entry Visa for that country. But, my January 2005 trip being my first to the country, I planned to just stay in and around Saigon to get used to the country as I would find it nowadays, 30 years after our war there. So, I made no effort to get Visas to the surrounding countries.
Like my research warned me, there was a horde of people at the airport continually waiting to greet or bid farewell to Vietnamese family either being repatriated or leaving the country. To unsuspecting visitors like me, it could be overwhelming. The pilgrims however, were harmless. It was after all not 1968 or 1975. I found a driver and he got me to my humble hotel near downtown Saigon. I found out rather quickly that few Vietnamese called it the approved communist name of Ho Chi Minh City.
The pollution was suffocating. The heat was suffocating. The street and sidewalk vender operators on the burgeoning tourist streets were pesky. The scooter and truck noise was deafening, The city was bulging with humanity. But I laid up in my little hotel neighborhood for a couple days. I struck out on several walks in the narrow and catacombed streets of the once French city we had propped up as the capital of old South Vietnam during our war there. I was nervous as hell. But kids and people came out to see the stray American. Apparently, few Americans make the journey to Vietnam. Most of the people under 40 years old had never seen an American. Everyone was eerily...., nice.
One night at mid-night, I watched the Water Department crew fix a deep water pipe break by my hotel. They dug their deep hole in the street with shovels and a pick.
I found out that the only job allowed surviving South Vietnamese soldiers (a defeated army) was to peddle the Cyclo bikes - three-wheeled carts used to transport goods...., and people. The old operators of said bikes also slept in them. There is actually a couple contemporary movies filmed in Vietnam that both insert the cyclo in the story-line. One is called Cyclo which delves into some of the darker sides Vietnam in the 1990s. The other is called Three Seasons starring Harvey Keitel about an American Veteran who returns to 'Nam decades after the war.
I tryed a cylco ride or two, but although the drivers were tough souls that could peddle the heavy one-speed bikes all day, their distance was limited to the inner city from my hotel.
It was my intention to get out of the city a bit so I hired a dude - or actually he adopted me - to drive me around on a scooter. I could have rented a scooter myself but I would have been killed on the Saigon streets - no rules, other than, "biggest vehicle wins."
But, Scooter Dude's gig was too small to get me up to the Cambodian border. So, I hired one of hundreds of taxi dudes. I also was interested in finding out if some remnant of the old Bein Hoa military complex was still out east of Saigon. It would be about 15 miles away if it was still there at all. I had heard many of my Army colleagues that had been stationed in 'Nam mention the joint. It was the sight of an early Viet Cong attack on American and South Vietnamese Air Force personnel in November of 1964. That was before most Americans had ever heard of a strange place called...., Vietnam.
In an anti-climactic visit, Taxi-Dude pointed out the old air base was now an industrial complex.
"Coca-cola stored there now," Taxi-Dude said.
He spoke a bit of English and he said he learned it in Taiwan. He told me the tale about how he was a draft dodger of the Vietnamese war with Cambodia in the late 1970s and the early 1980s. The Vietnamese were tired of the then Cambodian regime's bandits wreaking havoc over the Vietnamese border. They finally decided to get rid of that architect of the Khmer Rouge "Killing Fields" of Cambodia, one crazy dictator named Pol Pot. Ironic that the communist Vietnamese had to rid the world of the extreme communist Pol Pot and his Khmer Rouge pals who killed millions of innocent Cambodian people. But, I digress.
Anyway, Taxi Dude had fled to Taiwan. More ironic poetry; a Vietnamese draft dodger. Apparently 'Nam let him back home in the 2000s. Somewhere during the story, said dude offered me the on-board meal..., cheap cookies and Coca-cola.
By the way, Taxi-dude said he knew how to get me up to the border of Cambodia. At one point it is only 50 miles or so from Saigon. I thought it was relevant history because Ol' President Dick Nixon sent a special armada into Cambodia in 1970 to hunt down Charlie Cong (what Americans called the enemy). It had limited success, and President Dick got into trouble because he was accused of expanding the War after he said he was going to wind it down.
While Taxi-dude relayed his story in broken and painful English, we passed through muddy jungle trails just big enough for his beat up car to fit down. You would think that just 50 miles from one of the biggest cities on earth, one might find a..., damn paved road.
One thing lead to another and it was clear Taxi-dude was good and lost. Finally he stopped and asked a peasant woman if we were close to Cambodia. Even I knew what she said by the way she laughed and pointed back down the road.
"If you have been on this road since the last cross road, you have been in Campuchia for about five kilometers. You guys are already in Campuchia...., stupid men."
I choked on my cookies as we sheepishly drove back into Vietnam past the sleepy jungle border soldiers on the Vietnamese-Cambodian border. They took drags on their cigarettes and had their feet propped up. Their AK-47s just leaning against the guard hut. Taxi-Dude shrugged and waved like he was greeting old pals. I held my breath. The guards just looked bored. Apparently they do nothing during their lunch time. God bless communist ritualism.
Talk about being a candidate for the National Geographic television series...
..., Locked Up Abroad!
Note: This blog "Fate Fairies" - book version Category is a work in progress. The original vignettes are being edited for book form. Go to the Cooldadiomedia Web site and the Fate Fairies Page for an ordered chronology of the book vignettes (chapters).
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