Knife on the family jewels - Fate Fairies - book version
This entry was posted on 12/12/2011 2:00 AM and is filed under Fate Fairies:Fate Fairies - book version.
Rule number...., what the hell is the number of that rule?
Whatever the number, the content of the rule is, "Never fuck with an old salty bastard in a bar."
Back in 1983ish, Heide and I made a quick trip up from Dallas, Texas, to see family and friends in Wisconsin. We still had our first jointly owned car, the Datsun 210 Hatchback. Those were the days I did not have any aversions to driving 1000 miles straight through without sleep. Nowadays, I either just don't do it or it is a four-day ordeal if I do drive that far at all.
We blew into town and visited my parents on the farm out Whitewater way - the last time I would see the place as we owned it. Sandy the dog had died of old age; Uncle Art was in a nursing home..., his old house trailer dragged off to the junk yard. We then spun off to Heide's parents in Lake Geneva and I remember her Mom doting over our every need. Then it was off to visit one of Heide's bridesmaids Vickie and her boyfriend Rob who had been a dog handler in the Army in Germany at the same time I was in the Army Engineers in Germany.
It was a whirlwind journey, but for two young adults in their mid 20s, it was right up our alley. I look back at those times with fondness now, even though at the time it was a harried era for us.
Then, it was time to make one last stop at the very place Heide and I met. The old bowling alley basement bar and nightclub/disco. All the usually suspects were there. Alcohol flowed and stories abounded. The Saturday night crowd bulged as the night lingered past midnight.
A bunch of former and current bouncers, and former and current bartenders were gaggled in a circle by the end of the bar. The old hallway to the bathrooms was adjacent to that area. Many a debauchery had incubated right in that very spot in my days as a bouncer and bartender.
People shuffled past us to get to the rest rooms. After a while an old salty gray-haired dude totally dressed in different era jeans and denim threads past us by to get to the rest room. He had a scruffy gray beard and he was shorter than all of us; maybe he was 40ish. Just as he passed, someone in our group finished a joke and as he staggered by me we all laughed at the punch line. I laughed a louder raucous laugh. The guy gave me an irritated bloodshot glance.
When old dude came back out of the bathroom hallway, he stopped in front of me and said, "You think laughing at old fuckers is funny...., Punk?!" I felt a disturbance by my groin. When I looked down a dandy long shiny switch-blade was pressed against my family jewels.
Regardless of the aforementioned rule, the other important rule in life is, "If you pull a weapon, be sure and use it." Said perp hesitated. Wrong actions to take in a circle of lit up bouncers. Said old dude was expeditiously dragged feet first, up the back stairs with head banging on the steps the whole way.
But, a lesson was logged in my pea head that night...., by me: "Be careful what is around you when you act like a loud mouth."
.....the family jewels may be at stake.
Note: This blog "Fate Fairies" - book version Category is a work in progress. The original vignettes are being edited for book form. Go to the Cooldadiomedia Web site and the Fate Fairies Page for an ordered chronology of the book vignettes (chapters).
